Jul 27, 2010

Is this what love looks like?


For my 8th anniversary (today) to my husberdin, I thought I would post a little essay I started to write over a year ago. I wrote this as part of a writing challenge my friend made and I wanted to support her, but never finished. It was a valentines writing challenge about describing what love looks like in your marriage.

Let me just throw it out there that even though my dad taught English for his career... I in no way claim to have any writing skills whatsoever... nor do I use correct punctuation. With that being said, here is my 8th anniversary declaration of my love for JB...

It was a long year, as if a lifetime of heartache had been crammed into the past few months. I had been in the same room as my husband only a handful of times over the past few months, and I ached for our carefree days. We had a infant who couldn't eat, and needed medicine administered around the clock. We were exhausted, and were still trying to process what had just happened to our family. We were different, we had changed, and we desperately needed a break, even just a minute together to breathe. My mom insisted we get out of the house and she would handle everything for a couple hours while so we could go somewhere alone together. Our fridge was bare, so I proposed we go do some grocery shopping. My husband usually avoids shopping all together, but knew I needed this time to get it done. As newlyweds we did all of our grocery shopping together. I loved to find things on our list before him, and ask his opinion about upcoming meals. He never took our grocery shopping seriously and spent the majority of time messing around like a teenager. His typical behavior consisted of nonchalantly trapping me against shelves with the grocery cart, or putting ethnic food items in the cart trying to convince me that he had been craving that item. Usually I would roll my eyes and he would continue doing it over and over until I gave in and gave him the belly laugh he was after. Somehow, to him, it never got old.

When we arrived at the store I was all business because the pull to be back home with my baby increased by the minute. I felt panicked if I wasn't in close proximity to her, but knew she was in perfectly good hands. We began shopping and the first time my husband used the cart to steer my body into a shelf I was relieved that despite us being worlds away from our carefree mentality, we could still be reminded of that life just being together with a shopping cart. I found myself letting go and tried to remind my husband how much fun I can be. We enjoyed the rest of our shopping trip and took our time loading up our groceries knowing that our time away was nearing an end.

On our way home we were stopped at a red light and he looked over at me and asked with a masculine voice, "think I can beat him off the line?" My husband was driving a nice truck so I'm sure he could have regardless of who or what was next to us. I turned my head and saw a rusted Winnebago circa 1970, with a 80+ year old driver. I looked back at him and rolled my eyes. He continued, "do you think I can take him, Meem?" Then he began to rev the engine and lurch the truck forward repeatedly trying to intimidate the senior citizen. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of thinking I thought he was funny, although he knew better. I tried to hold in my laughter, but after he kept revving the engine with a tough guy look on his face, I gave in. I laughed...out of embarrassment maybe, but he was funny. I couldn't bring myself to look back at the elderly gentleman, afraid of the look he might give us. The light turned green and my husband sped forward, of course beating him off the line. As my husband began to celebrate his victory and give a faux victory speech I looked at him and thought... this must be what love looks like.

JB- this is only one example of what our love looks like. I am crazy tired but wanted to write down some things about you, so when we are 70 years old we can read back and remember what our love looked like.

Top Ten reasons I am loving you right now-

#10- "Mia, Mia...wannagodisneylan?" "Mia, Mia, wanfidollars?" You say this at least five times a day to hear her sweet little voice say, "nooooooo."

#9- your overuse of the word legit.

#8- your intense love for our babies, and how you need to "breathe them in."

#7- how you can't go 24 hours without hurting yourself- and the noise you make while injuring.

#6- how you block out the world when we are together in the car, and always miss our exit. well, this is a love/hate.

#5- How you change the words to every song, and sing them at the most appropriate and inappropriate times.

#4- How you quote our children all the time to mess with them and they are oblivious, but I always laugh.

#3- How you cry when you watch father of the bride... he he just kiddin- that's all me.

#2- Your commentary...about everything...it's funny! You make me laugh all the time, and you love to laugh yourself...especially when you are watching the tv show wipe out. You laugh hysterically watching people getting "worked."

#1- How you insist that we slow dance, and the kids think you're attacking me, and they come to my rescue.

I love you hun- happy 8th anniversary.

Me Love you long tyng!!


Photographer: Rebecca Pierce said...

Lolololololol. I'm so glad you posted this! It is well written, and you do know what love looks like! I know I'm an easy laugh, but JB always makes me laugh...he is funny and your post about him making you laugh made me laugh. BTW, since my husband is always asking me to give him "three reasons why you love me" I will say that you owe JB three more reasons. The love/hate ones count against you, taking one good one away, and the Father of the Bride one wasn't really a one...so...three more reasons please! Lol. Well, those are Chris' rules anyway, I get the love hate thing, but he says they don't count. The best thing about John is that I can talk super dated thug and he is totally down. The problem is that this leads me to incorporate thug into my daily interactions with normal people, and they DO make fun of me. Lol.

Rebecca said...

Happy Anniversary!

I'm thinking something strange is going on...today is our 8th anniversary, too...and I know of another couple that shares today...all of us had babies with HLHS. Hummm....

Hope y'all are having a great one!

I heart Max! said...

Awww,,,, I love you guys.... I may have shed a tear!

Brimaca said...

So dang cute! My hubby does crazy silly things too but they are much to embarrassing to post about. :)

Talia said...

Not only was that absolutely beautiful, but I think every heart parent that reads your blog probably cried when reading your "essay." Congrats on 8 years John and Mimi

Anne said...

Mimi, you are a natural writer, a fantastic natural. No kidding. Your writing has perfect tone, voice, and the other word I am thinking of is pacing I think. Where you move from one idea to the next seamlessly. Anyway, I love it, and you. And I am glad my big bro has someone to love him so much.

Becca said...

This post has made me think of all the cute and annoying things my hubby does that I absolutely love. You always have such cute ideas.

Becca-Ellie's mom

Analisa-creator of hairblingzcutethings said...

i totally loved this post! i've been so out of the blogging world lately and i realize how much i miss your blog. and you and your sweet family! you guys are an amazing family with an amazing love! hope you have a wonderful anniversary! p.s.your hubby is pretty funny! and you always make me laugh too!

Analisa-creator of hairblingzcutethings said...

oh ya, and this made me shed tears too! love ya kid!