I Still haven't blogged about last years heart walk... that is how far behind I am.
I just wanted to make sure that everyone who wants to attend this knows about it.
Sadly this year we will be participating in the angel ceremony.
It it heart breaking.
I remembering crying under my sunglasses last year just feeling overwhelming gratitude that we were sitting on the hill with our little heart girlie.
I truly felt like we would always be on that hill.
I miss her so much. Somedays it feels like she was just here... others feel like I have been in agony needing her my entire life. Sometimes the pain of her absence is so great I forget that I once knew a life without pain. I strain to get back to that place often because that is where she is. A beautiful life... with all of my children.
My awareness of beauty has drizzled back into my life, but the pain accompanies me every where I go. There truly is no long lasting escape. I feel free from sadness here and there, but despair is always within reach.
I am working... working on balancing the scales. Please believe me when I say that I don't want to be more sad than happy. I don't. I need to chip away at the grief and start living for Mia. It's just such a lofty idea and most days it is just easier to wallow in misery reminding myself that I don't get to have her here. I am a work in progress.
I know that sadness will always be a part of me, but it doesn't have to consume me.
Back to the heart walk-
If you would like to attend the heart walk (and I would love for you to come)
You can register HERE. Pre registration ends soon.
I am going to try and do something special for all the Mia fans who attend.
There is a breakfast and auction as well.
See you there!