Sep 3, 2013

Jensen turns 9

These pictures are from last year. 
I didn't blog about his birthday yet.  
I was so busy getting ready for Mia's trip, and then our lives came to a screeching halt.
This isn't the party party... it was just us singing to him on his actual birthday.
I can't believe how light his hair is.  It has darkened so much this past year.
This boy is happiness.  

Oh my little girl.
Getting these photos uploaded makes me crave this life.
I want the beautiful, sunsetting, family together, birthday, celebrating life back.
Something is always missing now.  That little super cheese little girl is not here and there is a huge hole in our lives.  Can't I just go back and have this life?

Such a happy time
-Big boys turning 9
-Sweet little girls watching their brothers with precious smiles
- Little brothers just happy to be in the mix

The girls helped take out the candles.  
It may not look like much, but this photo holds so much for me. 
Just seeing her little body and blond hair reminds me of true Joy
It's a picture that speaks to my soul. 
I remember feeling so fulfilled with my life... singing to my boy with all of my people. 

I truly can't believe that a year has gone by from when we were singing happy birthday to my boy all the way to today.  Some days it feels like Mia was just here... just helping me remove candles, and asking me for drinks. Some days it feels like I am going to have to wait a million life times before I get to hold her again.  
I have frozen many of these moments in my mind straining to remember her every move.

These are the last days we had with our girl...  She was so healthy and happy.
It is still a shock to my system when I wake up to the reality that she is not here.